Let’s get the suppertime shape update out of the way early. It’s been a little over a week and I’ve lost right at eight pounds.
Look out, folks, I might be patrolling the pool deck in a speedo this summer if I can keep this rate up.
Granted I would have to keep that rate to the tune of about 50 more pounds and then add back 20 in muscle mass. Even then, I can’t get past the awkwardness of walking around in what amounts to tighty-whities.
I had a dream about that once – went to school in nothing but my underwear – terrified me to death. Seriously, that was worse than any ghost or goblin nightmare you can have, I think.
But to let you in on my workout regimen … well … I tried to fly a kite on a day with absolutely no wind Saturday, which required a good sprint down the old no. 1 fairway at Old Stone Fort Golf Course. That’s it. I do plan to start adding more cardio in soon, though.
The way I figure it getting in shape isn’t just about this summer or an October wedding, it is my first step in preparing for doomsday.
I’m only kidding. Sort of.
I don’t know if you’ve seen this show on television or not, but it’s called Doomsday Preppers (another reality show, of course), and it highlights different folks who believe the end is near. Some think a financial collapse is imminent, others warn of nuclear warfare, zombie apocalypse’s and other world-ending disasters. Some have stocks of weapons and ammunitions that would make small countries jealous – complete with trip wires and the works. Others rely on stocking enough food for years in their underground bunkers that can withstand nuclear blasts and the like.
Meanwhile, some are honing in their outdoor survival skills. I think that’s what I’m gonna’ go for and I have very simple reasons.
Getting in shape and building a fire with sticks and trapping wild game with a MacGyver-like gadget is relatively inexpensive. Tom Hanks did it in “Castaway.”
I can’t afford to buy 15 assault rifles, enough ammunition to take out a militia and stick a bunker underground.
But I can eat healthy now and lose some weight, maybe jog some down the road. Holly and I did take the short hiking route at Old Stone Fort State Park Saturday. Now I know that I need to extend my training a little, but I think I’m well on my way.
Otherwise, I would have to take out a sizable loan to buy all the other for an event that may or may not happen tomorrow.
For my luck and on my salary, I could see the bank coming to repossess my basement of weapons on Monday … and Armageddon would happen on Tuesday.
-Josh Peterson is the editor of the Manchester Times. He has won TPA awards for his writing and photography. He can be reached by email at firstname.lastname@example.org or by telephone at 931-728-7577 ext. 105. Follow him on Twitter @joshpeterson29